Saturday, August 8, 2026

Ne'er-do-wells.

A wonderful morning. The scudding clouds giving way to blue skies. There's a warm southerly wind that makes being out a pleasure. One of the wild flowers that line the farm track has lantern heads that have dried in the recent dry weather and now crackle and snap in the breeze. There was a breakfast cereal that used to snap crackle and pop. I wonder if it's still made ?  

The crows that congregated on our roof have moved down to the  potato barns where they line the field walls, glare at passers by and sunbathe. Periodically they take off in a huge swirling argumentative mass before settling on the power cables which sag alarmingly when they land. Is it the near presence of humans that's made the birds suspicious or have they always been jittery ? When we moved from Scotland to Italy we spent our first night on the road at a hotel in Northumberland. The wire fences on either side of the entrance gate were adorned with dead crows. Probably twenty of them in total. This gave the place a Hammer House of Horrors feel that presumably served some farming purpose. A country warning to crows 'Don't eat my barley !' or ' Don't glean my corn !' or some such thing. I'm glad our local farmers are content to leave the crows to their own devices.... as they do with everything else including the light footed young foxes who scamper on the path ahead of us.

It's a couple of days since we returned from Glasgow but we're still happily commenting on the cheerful service at the restaurant and the hotel . To be greeted with a smile is a delight.


We think we're out and about early but the farmers automated dispensing machine is already running low on strawberries and only large trays of a dozen or more eggs are left. All the half dozen cartons are gone. The second home owners continue to snap everything up.


In town the fun fair is being set up. This has been going for centuries in one form or another. Local residents disapprove of the sort of clientele it attracts. The retired Church of Scotland minister ( the one who raged at the students who 'cavorted amorously' on his new flat roof kitchen extension )  refers to them as teenage Ne'er -do-wells. This is the sort of archaic term you only hear in places like St Andrews or Crieff. The art that festoons some of the rides is so awful it serves as a reminder that aliens must surely live among us. They almost manage to get things right but somehow catching a true human likeness is just beyond them. Two 'luscious lovelies' - as the fair attendees might call them - painted on the side of one ride also serve to tell us the fairground aliens exist in a time that isn't woke.


We stop to read the menu on the burger wagon. It has an exhaustive chip offering. 'The Font' thinks " Chips with any of the two above " will be a favourite of the ne'er- do-wells. Donuts are served in portions of four.


The souvenirs on sale in the local shops tend to the 'tat' end of the spectrum but the candle shop has a new range of mugs and jugs which are a higher order of creation.  The robin and Scottie jugs pass muster although demand for jugs by the day trippers might be limited.

7 comments:

Lisa in France said...

Rice Krispies! Still going strong.

Camille said...

Yes indeed, Kellogg's Rice Crispies are very much available in the US featuring their mascot elves "Snap, Crackle, and Pop"; who are displayed front and center on the box. I'm pleased to report the cereal still very much "snaps,crackles,and pops when milk is added.

Thankfully, over here crows are protected from such inhumane attempts to deter them by federal law and the Migratory bird treaty act. I have a childhood memory of a local farmer who engaged in such vile practices until he was stopped by authorities.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
Lisa and Camille have confirmed for you... but let me add, Angus, that you can now also by Cocoa Pops... yes, Rice Krispies chcoclate version! (The benefit to the kids is the milk it makes them drink with the sugary stuff...) YAM xx

Linda said...

Oh I love the Lammas Fair in St Andrews. Such a link with the turning of the farming and natural year. Very much town and hinterland rather than gown.

Angus said...

I wish I could see something natural - or farming related -in the Lammas Fair. Still, by mid week it will be heading off to bring cheer and candy floss elsewhere.

Travel said...

You will have to be the early bird, to get the strawberries

rottrover said...

Did the farmer install the dispenser since the daughter went off to college? How was her visit to Jackson Hole?