Thursday, January 11, 2018

Woks not mentioned.


Two little cars drive up and park outside the church as I'm giving the PONs their pre-lunch walk. They're rental cars. You know rental cars in France because they're all registered in the Oise department and have the number 60 on their registration plates. The owner of one of the cars shouts out and asks if I know where the swaying Jesus is. He's parked directly in front of it and is ten maybe twelve feet away from the thing so it's difficult to reply without sounding sarcastic. There's no wind today so there is no swaying. '' Turnaround. You can't miss it. There's only the one " seems a suitably neutral response. The question is a bit like people on planes coming down the aisle and asking which is the window seat. Bob and Sophie are keen to greet the new arrivals. They are 'encouraged' on their walk.


The PONs are held spellbound by the constant drama that is village life. The two carloads of out of towners go. Workmen come to install new road signs. The school buses bring back the little ones at lunchtime. Our neighbour The Old Farmer polishes his venerable motor home to an approximation of a showroom shine ( the fibreglass infilling on the wing doesn't buff up well ). Everything is carefully observed.


After lunch we head off to the cafe on the market square in the little market town. The cafe is deserted apart from three gentlemen of a certain age who sit, grumpily, putting the world to rights. Bob and Sophie get given a Breton butter biscuit to share. Sophie ( who has been recycling ) gets a quarter of it, her brother the rest. Thankfully, she has no idea that he's got the larger portion.


The Chinese family, mother, father and an unruly three year old male come to see the London flat with the agent. There is a rather one sided conversation about the Chinese style kitchen. '' You got Woof ? We got Woof. Woof very good " says the man. After some backwards and forwards banter it transpires that 'Woof' is a make of kitchen appliance  called Wolf. 'The Font' isn't sure if ' Woofs' are sold in the UK but promises to look into it. The Chinese family are very keen to move in quickly. The wife is looking forward to walking round the corner to Fortnum and Masons for her groceries. ' The Font' points out there is a Tesco Metro on the corner which will cost a quarter, maybe a fifth, of the price of shopping in Fortnums. This information is greeted with silent incredulity. As they go the man, perhaps to make quite sure 'The Font' has understood says '' Woof very good " .They then go. Flaming woks are not mentioned










11 comments:

Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

The swaying Jesus is now on the tourist map?

WFT Nobby said...

Perhaps Bob and Sophie could be sent over to London to provide the Woofs?
(The PONs are not alone in being held spellbound by the constant drama of life in your village!)

MOPL said...

Absolutely Bertie. Spellbinding the drama in the village.Our lives are boring in comparisom

Coppa's girl said...

Always amuses me when I see photos and read about China these days. How long ago was it that they were a closed society, all rode round on bicycles, wore Mao hats, and untrendy denim work clothes? Now many travel the world and demand "Woofs" !
There are garden tools made by Wolf - surely they can't mean those?
Wild morning here - Jesus would really put on a show !

Taste of France said...

If a person were looking for religious sights to see, what would they type into google that would bring up a swaying Jesus in a little village?

Angus said...

Good question. If you could use Google you probably wouldn't be coming to the village.The popularity of our village attraction is probably down to the France profonde grapevine.

liparifam said...

A Wolf Professional Range?? Wow, they don't ask for much, do they, LOL? I'm an avid and moderately accomplished home cook, but somehow I muddle through with one that was a fraction of the cost :)

liparifam said...

A Wolf Professional Range?? Wow, they don't ask for much, do they, LOL? I'm an avid and moderately accomplished home cook, but somehow I muddle through with one that was only a fraction of the cost :)

Anonymous said...

Oh Angus, Wolf ranges started at about 10K US and went to probably 18K last time I shopped 4 years ago.
The basic 4 burner/ 1 oven range would weigh 500 lbs +/-. They want Wolf b/c they want to use a wok at high flame (very powerful burners) with the Wolf wok accessories. My cousin's Chinese born wife has one. She flash cooks with the gas flame so high under it, it scares me.
I bought Viking and worried about the weight load under my range; can't the agent just say no and find another renter? BTW, HB to the sweetest PONs ever! Pam in NH

Angus said...

They're difficult to find in the UK. They probably have to be imported to order with all the import duties and fees associated with that. You're right about the gas flame. Someone we know has Chinese diplomats as tenants and they wanted a WOOF as it produces a flame that European products don't.

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
I see Anon has addressed the Wolf issue; industrial-strength appliances. For woks, the equivalent of open fire cooking... I'd be saying the tenant can have exactly what they want as long as they pay for it! (My parents did that once, with success.) YAM xx