A start of day drink from a puddle . Not just any puddle but the one a herd of cows has just walked through.
Back at the car there's time for an ear scrunch before setting off for the morning croissant.The social calendar of a family diva. The school bus driver stops to tell us that there's a chance the schools will be closed for a couple of months.
As we get back to The Rickety Old Farmhouse the post lady delivers a package containing a small hand held steam cleaner. This enables 'The Font' to take that Lutheran passion for cleanliness to new heights .... but not before Angus has assembled it.
Years ago our travel agent in DC booked us on a cruise. He said we would love it. ' It caters to a very sophisticated crowd'. We were the only non-Americans on a trip from Vancouver to Alaska. All the other passengers were jovial party animals from Missouri and Mississippi. They ate voraciously and continuously. Things that you would never think of serving with whipped cream were served with whipped cream. When not eating they would drink - Bloody Mary's for breakfast, Bellinis ( How chic is that !!!!) for lunch and hi-octane cocktails with slightly saucy names before dinner. They - both husbands and wives - wore quite remarkable outfits to dinner. There are parts of America where string ties really are a thing and sequins never go out of fashion. The high spot of the cruise was the gala dinner where Baked Alaska with sparklers was served. Our fellow passengers would stand and clap and whoop and holler as these flaming concoctions were paraded around the restaurant. Gentlemen would throw their Stetsons in the air. Being novices we were the only ones onboard who hadn't opted for the 'all you can drink beverage package : $69 per person per day ; tax and gratuities extra'. People would observe us reading the wine list and make observations like '' I don't know why you pay all that money for a bottle. The house Chardonnay is really quite remarkable . It's from Ecuador ". The word 'remarkable' being open to a variety of interpretations we could truthfully agree . 'The Font' would be up at first light and 'encourage' Angus to sign us up for all the shore excursions - whaling stations, glaciers, indigenous peoples cultural tours, otter spotting , Russian heritage sights. Everyone else, being seasoned cruise ship travellers, would stay on the boat and work off their hangovers. They found our enthusiasm for exploration borderline pathological. This article about buffets brought that unforgettable experience to mind : https://thehustle.co/the-economics-of-all-you-can-eat-buffets/
14 comments:
I take it you are in the same camp as the fabulous Dr. Fauci, director of the US National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, who today said "Personally, I would never go on a cruise ship because I don’t like cruises . . . " I think he got the only laugh of the day. Watching Sophie skip down the lane seems like a much more worthwhile past-time. Cherry passed her heart and other tests yesterday, so she is a "go" for surgery. Turned out my husband was confused and she actually could have had breakfast. Unforgiveable.
A friend of mine is supposed to go on an Alaska-Vancouver cruise in a few months, along with several siblings. They are all in their mid-60s to mid-70s, all with chronic health issues. My friend would qualify as sophisticated (first qualification being my friend, of course), but his siblings would fit with the description you provide. Your shipmates do sound as if they had fun, though given a choice between a cocktail with an umbrella and an indigenous peoples visit, I would choose the latter.
Please do relay a product review of the steam cleaner from the Font. Thumbs up/down would suffice.
Bertie never passes up a chance for a slurp of Eau de Cow Puddle. Preferably while standing in the muddiest spot.
Gail subscribes to the club that regards cruise ships as floating Petri dishes, even before the current coronavirus outbreak, and your description of your trip to Alaska reinforces her plan never to embark on this form of travel...
Good news that Cherry is up for the surgery. Hope she had two breakfasts this morning . Thanks for letting us know. The PON world isn't a large one and all of its citizens somehow feel close.
It is unlikely that a long leisurely cruise will ever again feature on our holiday plans.
A very wise travel decision .
The steam device gets 5 stars - easy to use and even easier to assemble.
Firmly in the no cruise camp here, even before the coronavirus. I read the article at your link - I wonder what the food wastage is on cruise ships, with the need to display an excess of food to delight the eye if not the palate.
Your trip description was entertainingly spot on and similar to my one and only cruising experience down the "Mexican Riviera". I couldn't wait to get off that giant ship. But I've often pondered if a scaled down in size vessel on a European river cruise would be a pleasant experience. But then, perhaps not this year...
Hari OM
I am definitely non-cruise; not thinking just of the 'petri dish' effect that Gail mentions, but being confined with a load of folk I would not wish to meet anyway... and being that they are geared towards a lifestyle so opposed to my own. Your experience describes exactly what I imagine - and would have nightmares about!
Environmentally, cruise ships are WAY more damaging than flying to one's destination. YAM xx
Inca has never had the pleasure of an eau de cow puddle and wonders what she's missing!
I'm a firm believer that you shouldn't knock a thing unless you've tried it, but am firmly in the no cruise camp too, having endured several when my husband was alive. They suited him well, because we could see quite a large area of wherever, and he didn't need to map read, or drive, or book any hotels! I hated all but one, when we went on a Baltic cruise. I found that the people on that one were of a different mindset. The last one we took was to Iceland, and was peopled with at least 50% Chinese - or Asian, who sadly turned out to be some of the most ill mannered people we have ever met.
I have the exact same steam cleaner...somewhere - I'm sure it was very effective, if only I can remember where it is! I also have a window cleaner (battery operated) by the same people. A bit of a waste of time, as it doesn't deal well with the deluges of sandy rain we get here!
That must be a very delicious puddle Sophie-Pon. Mud is potentially good for the complexion, but I'm not entirely certain that it should be consumed, however I shall defer to your wisdom in this matter, as you are so pretty.
x
Not a cruise person, however did go on the Alaskan cruise--actually had a table with a variety of people from around the world, European River Cruise, and the Ferry along the Norwegian coast. Just the look of those modern ships with parks down the centre give me the shivers.
Also, can't stand buffets or 'family' restaurants where kids can race around from one amusement to another!
Oh I laughed out loud reading this! My ex husband is very fond of buffets and has lingered so long occasionally at the restaurant, the manager has had to tell him he has to leave! He tells that story as if he is quite proud by the way!
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